Sunday, June 17, 2007
Trashing
The time is 3.48 pm according the clock on the computer. I have about 15 mins to trash it all out....at 4 sharp i'll start work..my mad dash to finish everything history related so i can actually move on to another subject. Okie.i'm just gonna let my thoughts take control and lead me to where they want me to go...HOPEFULLY my pathetic, failing typing ability will be able to catch up.here goes.
Hmm..the first thing coming to my mind right now is actually a comment by XL on friendster.It was quite surprising when i received it. I didnt send a comment back to reply cos well..i didnt know what to say. His comment was an attempt to apologise for the very bad direct hitting he made me take before LDC regarding worship. I was really quite pissed off that night, ignoring the email but at the same time, checking it every now and then to readjust my worship songs.The worst thing was it was sent to every one in the ldc com then + officers..so yeah, it made me feel really quite horrible about my own ability to lead worship, choosing worship songs then. Oh well, i didnt take it personally then, just thought it was quite discouraging, but he apologised during ad party, so it was really ok..but somehow it doesnt seem so. People coming to me after my worship session telling me the song choice was perfectly fine just added fuel to fire..my own fire. Oh well, XL is a super nice guy and all, but yeah...he and I dun really click, so i'm asking God to hmm...help me forgive.Hayz...Lord, really, if i'm hammering this in my heart, I'm giving it all to you, please help me just surrender this small matter to You and mend the friendship btw me and XL. I really dun like this...argh
Next,..hmm thanksgiving!Today i went to church after a really really long time (3 weeks) of absence. Hayz..i wish i could be more involved in my church. i think its a really a wonderful church with a wonderful team of leaders who really dedicates their work to the Lord and is leading the congregation in the right direction. Worship,led by Paul, was really good. We sang Knowing you, a song familiar to me and the officers but new to my church, so i was singing it louder than anyone else.I just felt very revived and ministered after worship.I really could feel God's presence in sanctuary.My church's worship team is really good.Hmm..to think i was once part of the team..nvm..that's another one i'll trash out later.Hmm..today message, thank You Lord, You are ever so loving and understanding and caring...i'll use all my vocab i could to describe this lol..really..Today's message (or rather this month's theme) is MENTORSHIP!Wonderful huh? Here i was, just yesterday night, the previous post, asking God how should i mentor Erica and a number of other juniors (BB and Crescent), am i adequate or qualified to be a mentor despite my age and all. He answered today, and provides means for me to do so. The message was just really..wow...God's words to me so personally...How mentor should be just a big bro or sis who has more experiences and skills in certain areas and could impart to the younger ones...and how one should take risks, see the potential in the mentee, trust God, empower the mentee with clear guidance and instructions...All the things i need to know was laid out in clear steps, provided with verses and examples from the Bible (paul and timonthy, job and barnabas). Moreover, there is a course on "reaching the heart of your teen" organised by my church. its really gd...looking at the flyer..i think I SHOULD sign up..although i'm not a parent =P yeah, its for parents but well, i'm dealing with a very rebellious teen and i think it'll be of use when primers take on the role of mentorship nex year. anyway, we are mentoring the sec 2s...who are teens and can be rebellious and all...God is so wonderful!Hayz =)) God, THANK YOU!I just love You more and more each day, and just every so grateful for your providence, your care and love in all areas of my life.You laid the challenge, but you also provide the grace and help i need Lord. Just help me to serve you and remember to give praise to You for every blessing you pour out. Its all for Your Glory=))
Okie...time check..4.07 haha..I FAILED. but sorry, i really need to blog, or else i'll be wasting time at my study table anyway..oh well...4.30!okie we continue.
I catched up with Sheila!Yeah..Sheila dearie =))My bestfriend since PRIMARY 5!I just had to talk to her...so we had a girl talk session right after service...I just poured out my heart...my conviction and my trial God has chosen for me ahead...my heavy heart is just lifted(well actually it was kinda lifted yesterday but anyway, i still need to talk). We had so much to talk sheila suggested we go for lunch and yeah..so could have more time to talk =P On the way to the MRT, i just thanked God silently for a so wonderful friend He has provided since the hay days. Primary school classmates(bestfriends), sec sch..the troubled times..cell mates(still are) best friends still..NOW...still cell mates, and confidantes, and BESTFRIENDS =)) Hayz..shes one in a million...anyway we talked about a lot..she was sharing about her relationship and all...how God is very gracious and amazing in their relationship, and also how much she was challenged with, and yeah..Its really very heart warming to see her grow in it..both of them as a matter of fact. God blinded him from seeing that she likes him so that he could be sure of his conversion, that he wants to be a christian for God....he was a non christian and all, but yeah..now hes growing in the lord with her help, so sweet huh..Its like korean drama =P The two are not exactly together, cos they are scared..and they just give it all to God and let Him take them where He wants..hayz..the future is so uncertain...hmm..I'll definitely keep them in prayers..Sheila especially,since shes facing so many attacks from his ex-girlfriend to his close childhood friend, hayz..aiyo..really korean drama =P Haha Sheila dearie,if you're reading this, SMILE okie =DD Just remember you have the HEART and CHARACTER that surpass all earthly beauties and talents.You're a perfect creation in God's eyes =)
Okie...6 mins more..I'm QUITE satisfied...I havent finished trashing out everything actually..like my studies..and hmm yeah..there you go..the thoughts on my studies are coming back.Ive been thinking about it wayyy to much i think.Law, PR, hotel admin..international relations...the 4 choices of career i can see for myself.I really would love to do law..somehow, theres this great burden for family law and maybe human rights..but yeah the former being the one i'll probably major it. Its not like cos there are more divorces in the future and thats why i'm going there =P bleah...i just really feel that maybe as a lawyer, i can influence the choices of the couples, counsel a bit..being a victim of a so-called broken family and all...parents divorced and remarried..i know it best i think.Its gonna be quite depressing..but yeah, whats new...ive faced depression every turn of my life I'm getting used to it.Hayz..theres so much doubt about whether i can actually get into law sch,esp king, the one i'm quite convinced God is speakingto me about..but yeah..TRUST. ARGHH...God, if thats what you want me to do, what you call this child of yours to journey through, you would make the providence i cant comprehend. Lord, just help me trust in you and leave everything to you and your great plan i cant see just yet. I'm just having so many doubts..Lord..just calm my heart...I'm leaving every doubt at your feet, please just take them all...
okie!4.39..haha i failed AGAIN! Anyway.. i feel quite good now that some stuff is off my head..but more stuff..should i just extend it until 5 and yeah, just blog to my heart's content??lol yeah....I still have things to trash out..
Like my HEALTH. hayz..My throat is not exactly at its perfect condition despite almost 5 days of med. I completed the antibiotics although there was one day i forgot and delayed it but i finished everything except cough syrup...which was nearly finished anyway.AND...the phlegm is still there. Irritating...Im still preserving my voice as though i'm a chorister.Hayz, i do miss choir a lot. I think i'll have to do something about that. My entire body has conditioned itself since sec school so i could sing..like i use my diaphram to breathe instead of chest like most people..sometimes my breathing really comes from the region below the abs..4 fingers below the belly button haha..ms tham's words still rang in my ears..hayz... And yeah, like i still use my hands to straighten out my spiral cord at the neck so so that my body is perfectly straight, and i always straighten out my back when i sing, whenever i sing as matter of fact. I treasure my voice, because despite my lack of knowledge in bio, i do know the vocal cord is 1mm by 1cm in size..super small..and held balanced by 6 strings of muscles...something liddat haha..anyway, its a delicate INSTRUMENT , if not the most complexed and delicate to be exact. So yeah, breathing from hip..err or somewhere there, using the biggest muscles in the body(the one that wraps around the hip), helps the vocal cord and strengthen your breathing which in turn amplify and support the voice by tenfold. heh. Hayz..I'm still very much a chorister.
Worship...hmm..another huge sigh...I wanted to serve there, used to serve there, and still want to serve there now.Its the only place, beside the evangelism/EE ministry that i think i would be of greater service to the Lord. I really need to humble myself, seek God more and yeah..ask for strength and conviction to serve..cos theres a clash btw BB and church, and BB is keeping me away from my dear fellow EX-CONVICTS..our cell group that was once/maybe still is the anchor for my faith. Very amazingly, we have 3 BB boys & girl now haha...i can totally understand what Zach was talking about a few years back only now...AQ, Hike, Parade..Zach was very on for BB as well, so was YQ,the 2 of them then...YQ is still on, in fact YQ is the only primer in the 60th Coy..haha..hmm i should support him in prayers too..fellow primer after all. BUT then..we'll trash him during primers challenge WAHAHA...i'm feeling a bit evil hehehe =P
OKie...I REALLY need to stop..and yeah..i'm feeling a bit more satisified haha...okie..this post would be in contender to compete as the longest post.Hahah my bintan, unfinished post is still the leader.Okie, I'm satisfied enough to actually long to see MY STALIN now..hahaha=P.
back to mugging room and my promised-to-kill-alot-of-brain-cells mugging session =)))
The time is 3.48 pm according the clock on the computer. I have about 15 mins to trash it all out....at 4 sharp i'll start work..my mad dash to finish everything history related so i can actually move on to another subject. Okie.i'm just gonna let my thoughts take control and lead me to where they want me to go...HOPEFULLY my pathetic, failing typing ability will be able to catch up.here goes.
Hmm..the first thing coming to my mind right now is actually a comment by XL on friendster.It was quite surprising when i received it. I didnt send a comment back to reply cos well..i didnt know what to say. His comment was an attempt to apologise for the very bad direct hitting he made me take before LDC regarding worship. I was really quite pissed off that night, ignoring the email but at the same time, checking it every now and then to readjust my worship songs.The worst thing was it was sent to every one in the ldc com then + officers..so yeah, it made me feel really quite horrible about my own ability to lead worship, choosing worship songs then. Oh well, i didnt take it personally then, just thought it was quite discouraging, but he apologised during ad party, so it was really ok..but somehow it doesnt seem so. People coming to me after my worship session telling me the song choice was perfectly fine just added fuel to fire..my own fire. Oh well, XL is a super nice guy and all, but yeah...he and I dun really click, so i'm asking God to hmm...help me forgive.Hayz...Lord, really, if i'm hammering this in my heart, I'm giving it all to you, please help me just surrender this small matter to You and mend the friendship btw me and XL. I really dun like this...argh
Next,..hmm thanksgiving!Today i went to church after a really really long time (3 weeks) of absence. Hayz..i wish i could be more involved in my church. i think its a really a wonderful church with a wonderful team of leaders who really dedicates their work to the Lord and is leading the congregation in the right direction. Worship,led by Paul, was really good. We sang Knowing you, a song familiar to me and the officers but new to my church, so i was singing it louder than anyone else.I just felt very revived and ministered after worship.I really could feel God's presence in sanctuary.My church's worship team is really good.Hmm..to think i was once part of the team..nvm..that's another one i'll trash out later.Hmm..today message, thank You Lord, You are ever so loving and understanding and caring...i'll use all my vocab i could to describe this lol..really..Today's message (or rather this month's theme) is MENTORSHIP!Wonderful huh? Here i was, just yesterday night, the previous post, asking God how should i mentor Erica and a number of other juniors (BB and Crescent), am i adequate or qualified to be a mentor despite my age and all. He answered today, and provides means for me to do so. The message was just really..wow...God's words to me so personally...How mentor should be just a big bro or sis who has more experiences and skills in certain areas and could impart to the younger ones...and how one should take risks, see the potential in the mentee, trust God, empower the mentee with clear guidance and instructions...All the things i need to know was laid out in clear steps, provided with verses and examples from the Bible (paul and timonthy, job and barnabas). Moreover, there is a course on "reaching the heart of your teen" organised by my church. its really gd...looking at the flyer..i think I SHOULD sign up..although i'm not a parent =P yeah, its for parents but well, i'm dealing with a very rebellious teen and i think it'll be of use when primers take on the role of mentorship nex year. anyway, we are mentoring the sec 2s...who are teens and can be rebellious and all...God is so wonderful!Hayz =)) God, THANK YOU!I just love You more and more each day, and just every so grateful for your providence, your care and love in all areas of my life.You laid the challenge, but you also provide the grace and help i need Lord. Just help me to serve you and remember to give praise to You for every blessing you pour out. Its all for Your Glory=))
Okie...time check..4.07 haha..I FAILED. but sorry, i really need to blog, or else i'll be wasting time at my study table anyway..oh well...4.30!okie we continue.
I catched up with Sheila!Yeah..Sheila dearie =))My bestfriend since PRIMARY 5!I just had to talk to her...so we had a girl talk session right after service...I just poured out my heart...my conviction and my trial God has chosen for me ahead...my heavy heart is just lifted(well actually it was kinda lifted yesterday but anyway, i still need to talk). We had so much to talk sheila suggested we go for lunch and yeah..so could have more time to talk =P On the way to the MRT, i just thanked God silently for a so wonderful friend He has provided since the hay days. Primary school classmates(bestfriends), sec sch..the troubled times..cell mates(still are) best friends still..NOW...still cell mates, and confidantes, and BESTFRIENDS =)) Hayz..shes one in a million...anyway we talked about a lot..she was sharing about her relationship and all...how God is very gracious and amazing in their relationship, and also how much she was challenged with, and yeah..Its really very heart warming to see her grow in it..both of them as a matter of fact. God blinded him from seeing that she likes him so that he could be sure of his conversion, that he wants to be a christian for God....he was a non christian and all, but yeah..now hes growing in the lord with her help, so sweet huh..Its like korean drama =P The two are not exactly together, cos they are scared..and they just give it all to God and let Him take them where He wants..hayz..the future is so uncertain...hmm..I'll definitely keep them in prayers..Sheila especially,since shes facing so many attacks from his ex-girlfriend to his close childhood friend, hayz..aiyo..really korean drama =P Haha Sheila dearie,if you're reading this, SMILE okie =DD Just remember you have the HEART and CHARACTER that surpass all earthly beauties and talents.You're a perfect creation in God's eyes =)
Okie...6 mins more..I'm QUITE satisfied...I havent finished trashing out everything actually..like my studies..and hmm yeah..there you go..the thoughts on my studies are coming back.Ive been thinking about it wayyy to much i think.Law, PR, hotel admin..international relations...the 4 choices of career i can see for myself.I really would love to do law..somehow, theres this great burden for family law and maybe human rights..but yeah the former being the one i'll probably major it. Its not like cos there are more divorces in the future and thats why i'm going there =P bleah...i just really feel that maybe as a lawyer, i can influence the choices of the couples, counsel a bit..being a victim of a so-called broken family and all...parents divorced and remarried..i know it best i think.Its gonna be quite depressing..but yeah, whats new...ive faced depression every turn of my life I'm getting used to it.Hayz..theres so much doubt about whether i can actually get into law sch,esp king, the one i'm quite convinced God is speakingto me about..but yeah..TRUST. ARGHH...God, if thats what you want me to do, what you call this child of yours to journey through, you would make the providence i cant comprehend. Lord, just help me trust in you and leave everything to you and your great plan i cant see just yet. I'm just having so many doubts..Lord..just calm my heart...I'm leaving every doubt at your feet, please just take them all...
okie!4.39..haha i failed AGAIN! Anyway.. i feel quite good now that some stuff is off my head..but more stuff..should i just extend it until 5 and yeah, just blog to my heart's content??lol yeah....I still have things to trash out..
Like my HEALTH. hayz..My throat is not exactly at its perfect condition despite almost 5 days of med. I completed the antibiotics although there was one day i forgot and delayed it but i finished everything except cough syrup...which was nearly finished anyway.AND...the phlegm is still there. Irritating...Im still preserving my voice as though i'm a chorister.Hayz, i do miss choir a lot. I think i'll have to do something about that. My entire body has conditioned itself since sec school so i could sing..like i use my diaphram to breathe instead of chest like most people..sometimes my breathing really comes from the region below the abs..4 fingers below the belly button haha..ms tham's words still rang in my ears..hayz... And yeah, like i still use my hands to straighten out my spiral cord at the neck so so that my body is perfectly straight, and i always straighten out my back when i sing, whenever i sing as matter of fact. I treasure my voice, because despite my lack of knowledge in bio, i do know the vocal cord is 1mm by 1cm in size..super small..and held balanced by 6 strings of muscles...something liddat haha..anyway, its a delicate INSTRUMENT , if not the most complexed and delicate to be exact. So yeah, breathing from hip..err or somewhere there, using the biggest muscles in the body(the one that wraps around the hip), helps the vocal cord and strengthen your breathing which in turn amplify and support the voice by tenfold. heh. Hayz..I'm still very much a chorister.
Worship...hmm..another huge sigh...I wanted to serve there, used to serve there, and still want to serve there now.Its the only place, beside the evangelism/EE ministry that i think i would be of greater service to the Lord. I really need to humble myself, seek God more and yeah..ask for strength and conviction to serve..cos theres a clash btw BB and church, and BB is keeping me away from my dear fellow EX-CONVICTS..our cell group that was once/maybe still is the anchor for my faith. Very amazingly, we have 3 BB boys & girl now haha...i can totally understand what Zach was talking about a few years back only now...AQ, Hike, Parade..Zach was very on for BB as well, so was YQ,the 2 of them then...YQ is still on, in fact YQ is the only primer in the 60th Coy..haha..hmm i should support him in prayers too..fellow primer after all. BUT then..we'll trash him during primers challenge WAHAHA...i'm feeling a bit evil hehehe =P
OKie...I REALLY need to stop..and yeah..i'm feeling a bit more satisified haha...okie..this post would be in contender to compete as the longest post.Hahah my bintan, unfinished post is still the leader.Okie, I'm satisfied enough to actually long to see MY STALIN now..hahaha=P.
back to mugging room and my promised-to-kill-alot-of-brain-cells mugging session =)))
# posted by daydreamer @ 3:47 pm 
Subscribe to Posts [Atom]